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About Me Member Pencil Artist AsillaNailo20/Female/United States Recent Activity Deviant for 2 Years
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Statistics 30 Deviations
39 Comments
643 Pageviews

Devious Info

  • Current Residence: Where I am
  • Interests: Anita Blake, Drawing, Reading, Gaia, Monstersgame, Dungeons & Dragons...
  • Favourite movie: Empire Records
  • Favourite band or musician: Garbage, Plumb, 311
  • Favourite genre of music: Alternative
  • Favourite poet or writer: William Blake (poet), Laurell K. Hamilton (writer)
  • MP3 player of choice: Ipod
  • Favourite game: Dungeons and Dragons
  • Favourite cartoon character: Aang from Avatar
  • Personal Quote: Meow =^_^=
  • Tools of the Trade: Pencil, Sharpie, Colored Pencils

guilt is contagious

Tue Jun 2, 2009, 1:07 PM
So tired of being the one who's always sitting alone crying and feeling guilty. I've had to say that so many times it's pathetic. I feel so whiny but at the same time I know the pain I'm in, I know what I'm feeling. The people who said they'd be there to help hold me together, or at least put me back together after I fall apart, have only been contributing to the breakdowns. It seems to be that everyone is falling apart right now, and so many come to me with their worries and troubles. Normally that would be no problem and I love being the one people come to, but it's so hard to help other people when I'm pulling myself apart. The one thing I had for relief has been taken away and I feel so lost without it. I'm trying so hard to work hard and impress the managers at work. To be there for Eden and be a good mom, but I always feel like I'm failing her(and your words always seem to make it worse). Every part of my life seems so wrong and messed up. Urges and stupid actions and thoughts rule my brain, all I think about is things I can't do. Everything that I used to do to help me, I'M NOT ALLOWED TO ANYMORE. There it is I have no control over my own life and it seems to be in the hands of someone who doesn't have anymore control of their life, and knows less about what they're doing than I do.

  • Mood: Attraction
  • Listening to: Boom by Anjulie
  • Reading: Blue Moon
  • Eating: smoke
  • Drinking: smoke

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Comments


:iconinvadersonic:
oi oi oi oi oi oi i haven''t talked to joo in forever!!

--
We learn all sorts of things that aren't true! We call that "History" -- The Wizard, Wicked
"You can't expect my usual brand of stupid! I gotta mix it up a bit- keep ya on your toes :) " - Patrick, Spongebob.
~HyruleNationClub Care to join?
:iconasillanailo:
Ya I know, freaking work '-.-

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Eden Soto born on October 2nd!!!
:iconinvadersonic:
:iconvaatiplz: AH

--
We learn all sorts of things that aren't true! We call that "History" -- The Wizard, Wicked
"You can't expect my usual brand of stupid! I gotta mix it up a bit- keep ya on your toes :) " - Patrick, Spongebob.
~HyruleNationClub Care to join?
:iconrinimoon256:
you make my heart hurt when you say that nobody cares and that you have no one to talk to. what am i?
:iconasillanailo:
I'm sorry Rini, I know I've been such a recluse lately. I've felt so alone and only recently realized that I was the one making myself alone.

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Eden Soto born on October 2nd!!!
:iconrinimoon256:
yeah i know..and you wouldnt let me help even tho you said you wanted so bad to have someone to talk to. it really hurt hun
:iconasillanailo:
I'm so sorry babe

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Eden Soto born on October 2nd!!!
:iconitachixkisame:
yay! hiiii :D

--
Yar har, fiddle-dee-dee!
If you love to sail the sea,
You are a Pirate!

-Lazytown-
:iconinvadersonic:
oi! Tell everyone hi! And give Eden a kiss for me! :)

--
We learn all sorts of things that aren't true! We call that "History" -- The Wizard, Wicked
"You can't expect my usual brand of stupid! I gotta mix it up a bit- keep ya on your toes :) " - Patrick, Spongebob.
~HyruleNationClub Care to join?
:iconsearinoxdragonoffire:
Hey Meghan
I'm pretty sure u know who this is. In case u don't, its the one and only dragon freak of the Entropy group, Mel or Mel Gibson :D. You indeed do have a nice start. I welcome u to DeviantArt. If u need any help, u let me know. Otherwise, enjoy your time here and continue posting and stuff. And yes, they are nice artworks

--
Dragons are the purity of my soul and yet the destruction of my mind.

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